When I made a decision last week to practice what I call Management by Walking Away, I neglected to inform my husband of my new stance. The natural result was that over the weekend, in response to the same behavior I was addressing, he decided to practice something I’ll call, for lack of a better term, Management by Arbitrary Pronouncement.
In other words, “I will mete out punishment for some unspecified behavior, without telling you how to correct it, and then leave town so your mother can enforce my strange, new rules.”
Do I sound a little disgruntled? I am. I’m guessing there is a significant amount of disgruntlement going around our castle.
My husband and I basically agree on the behavior we want, but we go about getting it in a completely different fashion. Because I’m the one who’s usually home my methods, effective or not, are at least familiar. His are like being deposited in a forest with only a book of matches and a tarp and being instructed to find your way home.
I can tell you how I react to this situation. I hack my way out. The kids sit down and fiddle with the tarp. And then ask me how to get home.
It’s going to make for a very long week. We can only hope that by the time our dear one returns from his trip, he will have forgotten what it was he was mad about. Based on past experience, I’m guessing that will occur about the time he arrives at the airport this morning.