They’ve blinded me with science

IMG_0594And failed me in geometry, history, technology – you name it. My kids, that is.

Children are curious creatures, and mine are no exception. On a fairly regular basis, I emerge from sleep only to be hit with a question that has been burning in one of their little brains all night. I like to call this phenomenon the Unanswerable Question of the Day.

I know some of these have answers based in scientific theory or historical fact, but frankly, before I’ve had my first cup of coffee (or two), they make my eyes bug out.

So, dear readers, how would you answer the following?

  1. If you were a dragon, and you had a mouthful of water, how many noodles do you think you could cook in there?
  2. Would fire float in space?
  3. Did William Tell ever accidentally kill someone when he was shooting an apple off their head?
  4. What would have been better to own in the 1600’s – a weapons store, a farm equipment store, or a grocery store?
  5. Could the cat have kittens if we hadn’t had her sockets removed?
  6. When the Spartans rowed into battle, did the rowers also fight, or did they just row?
  7. What happens if you’re a T-Rex, and you want a baby T-Rex, but you accidentally poop out a caveman?
  8. Do trees feel pain?

Thus my problem. I don’t even know if William Tell was a real person, and I’m more than a little distressed at the idea that trees might feel pain.

Sigh. Time for that next cup of coffee.